2 posts tagged “crazy indian”
Here at my special place of business, there will be many times when card game will break out and you're not exactly sure how or why you're in the middle of it, but you kind of just go with the flow. The spawn of the majority of these impromptu card games is a man named ummm... lets call him Eddie.
Eddie is a crazy old Indian man, although he's not really Indian looking, doesn't really sound Indian, and he has blonde hair. I know that doesn't sound particularly convincing as to his authenticness, and I'm not sure I would have believed it either, but I have seen an Id card that said it, and he tried to scalp me once. If his stories are true, Eddie was wind talker for the United States as was his father. I think I believe it, but he's also told me that he has a Chinese brother because his mom worked at a Chinese restaurant and must have had too much rice. He's also told me that his mother has one leg and swims in circles.(makes sense to me)
Oh, where was I? Oh yes, the card games... Eddie is employed here, and he certainly does odds and ends, but what he does best is get a good card game going. He does this by walking up and saying either of the following, "Breakfast Baby?"(this is in the morning and the stakes are buying breakfast for everyone) or "Dollar Baby?"(this is at any other point during the day and could mean your paycheck is in jeopardy). The game is always five card draw, sometimes dueces are wild. When playing for breakfast, the idea is not necessarily to win but more not to lose. The man with the worst hand buys for everyone in the game.
Such was the case today and I'm happy to say that even though I didn't have a pair, I still didn't have to pay. That priviledge went to crazy Eddie, his king high wasn't quite enough. Breakfast was good, but I'm still worried about my scalp...
My place of employment drives me up a creek... I hope some people actually find this blog, because it would be a shame if these wacky(but true) stories aren't heard by folks that haven't already heard them. In the coming posts, I'm going to start recounting some of the indredible things that go on at my work. My hand to the sky, these are just some of the topics that will come up, and it's all 100% true: Drugs, Suicide, murder/suicide, stealing, adultery, divorce, bank robbery, multiple death threats, crack, prescription drug addiction, public drunkeness, dubious amounts of alcohol, STDs, strippers, a crazy indian, and of course...Me.
Today is particularly annoying to ME, but it may not be as exciting as all of those previous things. Today, the register key happened to come up missing and SHOCKER, I catch grief for it. Of course the owner's grandson(the guy I work with, lets call him Toby) was the last to have seen it. Although Toby has a history of having lost various and sundry items, he, as usual, claims he knows exactly where he put it, and it isn't there today. This would be perfectly believable if this sort of thing hadn't happened before, and usually the items turned up later, looking as if they had been missplaced rather than stolen. The last such incident being his missing work keys debacle that ending with Toby having accused two or three employees of having taken them... They were found the next day, in the bathroom, under a roll of paper towels. And because I'd be crazy if I didn't find the humor in these things, I made a little cartoon:
Well, as far as today goes, It's still up in the air whether the register key was taken, lost, or the "key" to a prank that isn't going over well and has progressed to the point where producing it wouldn't be very funny. The good part of it is, that we have ordered a couple of new keys for the register. They should be here in a couple of days. This means, of course, that I have a key, Toby has a key, and quite possibly, a crook has a key.
